Yesterday I had a major and profound insight in my life.

I am in the process of  living into my vision of having a virtual business that I can conduct from any place into the world. My first adventure will be to live in, and work from, Belize for three months at the end of this year.  I have one friend there, my dive instructor who I am in contact with on Facebook.  I let him know that I was starting to look on the internet for a place to stay and he offered to find me a place.

When he came back with a solution to my problem of finding a place with internet access, I showed up with a whole host of additional questions.   I felt a sense of nervousness in my body.  Would this place be OK?  Would I like living here?  As a guy could I trust him to make this decision for me?  Not withstanding all these questions, I told him to go ahead, but could I possibly see some pictures.

What I realized yesterday was I have never trusted a man to look after me and make an appropriate decision for me.  I have always had to have control of my own life.  On an energetic level if I don’t trust that a man will look after me, then who do you think that I attract into my life.  Men, where I am the driving force, men who can trust me to look after them.  Needless to say at some point either the man or I became unhappy and things fell apart.

Men are historically conditioned to be providers and as a woman I want to know that I can trust a man to provide for me, even if I earn more money.  Being a provider goes beyond money, it relates to a man being on purpose, having a target that they are going for, and having a zest for life.   So it is interesting that my inability to trust was sabotaging what I want most from fully showing up in my life.

When I surrendered to the idea of trusting my friend to choose an appropriate place for me, I could feel the flutters of fear in my chest.  I was actually afraid to let someone look after me.  Being a voracious learner in life, I have requested that my friend not send me pictures of the place he rents for me!

I said I wanted this to be an adventure and the adventure starts now.  I want to be responsible; I want to be able to respond to the possibilities as they occur.  Resistance and fear may show up and I am committed to resolving these in my life.

What is it that you don’t trust, be it at work or in relationships?  What is it that you are afraid of?  If you’re a woman, what are you doing or how are you being to create this situation?  If you’re a man, how ready are you to fully support the trust of a woman?

For myself I have touched up against this at least twice in my life.   The first time was when an  unfortunate and traumatic event occurred at work causing huge stress. The second time was last year when I was facing the prospect of divorce.  Major events can cause a lot of stress and these events push our “emotional hot buttons”.

The attached article provides a wonderful summary of depression and the warning signs for depression.  Unfortunately we can be really good at ignoring the early warning signs and just keep soldiering on.   I know, I did, and I just talked to a woman yesterday who is right in the middle of it.

Here is the link to the article.  http://us1.campaign-archive.com/?u=f9aa97b7af9b37ce524bcab00&id=ce81a9341c&e=1e5c4ed479

The article makes some great suggestions on how to over come depression.   The first 3 options, diet, exercise and vitamins can be used to prevent as well as manage depression.  From my experience there is at least one if not many other avenues to avert depression, prior to drug therapy.

In my case I did extensive work to resolve the emotional conditioning from my past that caused me to be fearful and shut down.  Due the pending divorce I was afraid to be alone and if things just stayed the same then I would be safe.

I participated in, and now teach, Core Dynamics Coaching.  These techniques released a tremendous amount of energy that had been stored in my body.  As a result most of my fears have dissolved, I have no anxiety and I feel an amazing sense of joy.

There are alternatives to drug therapy if we are willing to recognize our situation and take positive action early.   You can dissolve your “emotional hot buttons” and I believe avoid depression.  What avoids depression also leads to greater happiness, better life balance.  Not to mention that work will feel easier when you feeling good.

Jacque