This statement was posted on face book:
‘There are days when I hear my friends’ stories of corporate politics and backstabbing … I wonder… why do people have to play that way?”
In this month’s news letter from Catalyst Business Coaching I will talk about this from the corporate perspective and how to respond appropriately. Here I would like to talk about this from my personal perspective.
People who responded to the post indicated that people behave this way due to watching reality TV and drama magazines. This is the social conditioning argument, they are taught this in family life, school, team sports, dating, and the list goes on. ”This is a sickness that pervades more than just the work place.” I agree it is everywhere, because we as people are everywhere, and we have different kinds of insecurities.
From my own experience as I look back on who I was in the corporate world 10 years ago, the back stabbing seemed to come from a place of fear, lack of abundance, wanting to be better than someone else and looking for approval. Essentially I wanted to be loved and was afraid that I might not be. I felt separate from others and hence entered into competition with them. Unfortunately it was a game that was all about ME rather than a game that was about US.
Don’t get me wrong. At the time I believed that I was acting in the best interest of the WE. I thought that my solution was the best solution and the right way to go. So I excluded other’s opinions and when they didn’t agree with me I would talk about it with my “friends at work”. I would speak about how the other person was wrong and I would use great logical arguments as to why I was right. Was this backstabbing?
Do we promote back stabbing even more when one person’s perspective is fueled by gossip and a dash of embellishment? How many of us tell stories about other’s? Even after all the work I have done, my ego still wants to be right and I have to catch myself when I speak about others. My ego continues to behave as if I am separate from others and yet I know that I am connected to everyone. It is a constant practice to be impeccable with the words I speak.
Jacque
